Sports nobody cares about

by Brian Vallie


When the track team's budget is cut to make way for a new football stadium, Coach Franklin's only hope of saving his team is to repair relationships long burned down and win conference with a team he describes as "untalented walk-ons."


With the new athletic director comes a new direction: FOOTBALL.
Coach Franklin’s team is the first to be sacrificed to the football gods in the name of a new stadium. Without the help of funding or scholarships, Franklin schemes a way to sign the top recruits in the nation: the Swift Runner twins Brian, and Verleen, but Harold, their Crow tribe hating dad (Franklin is Crow) has other plans for them.
Franklin’s first fundraising scheme, a local 5k run gets no help from all the other non revenue generating sports (aka Olympic sports) due to Franklin never helping them. But Franklin isn’t done, he allows all of the un-recruited slower runners aka the “walk-ons” on the team, with a caveat: They must labor away at his 5k fundraiser.
Unbeknownst to Coach Franklin, the new A.D. schemes a way to get his team cut, so she can use his field and track for her new stadium, however she loses a narrow vote with the school board.
By the end of act two the team -including the Swift Runner recruits – are caught participating in the Beer Mile, causing Franklin to lose the vote on keeping his team. This will be his last year.
Franklin resigns and promises his funding from the 5k to the other non revenue generating sports, they inform him of an old rule: Any team coming off a conference championship is automatically safe from being cut, and gets a 15% funding increase.
Franklin watches his old Olympic race where he fell and took last, he decides that night to go for the conference win.
The next morning Franklin informs the new A.D. his plans and he wins over the Swift Runner twins. The new A.D. informs him the team captain is kicked off the team for appearing in a porno over the summer.


30min comedy

About this Writer

Tribal Affiliation

Crow Tribe
Tribal Affiliation Type

Union Affiliation


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Literary Rep


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