During a heartbreak, a lover once told me that I “feel too much”. This wasn’t the first time I felt inferior to the common mold or felt pressured to contort my body, heart, and the soul of who I am into a box created by another. Although this particular attack of my emotional vulnerability was fueled by a romantic sentiment it triggered a timeless feeling of trauma that my queer indigenous ancestry has battled endlessly: erasure. The Christian based heteronormativity our country clutches to, the colorist agendas behind beauty campaigns that always left out models of my complexion and height, and an overflow of entertainment media that supports anything but vulnerable communication or connection always left me feeling like “too much” -like being other was a bad thing. I spent the better part of my twenties as a Two-Spirit individual, not yet acquainted with the term or its Native meaning of embodying both female and male spirits(or gender), struggling to mold the perfect version of my gender and cultural identity out of the miniscule knowledge and guidance accessible to a masculine presenting queer person of color (POC). While doing so I found that utilizing cameras was the best way to help capture the popular themes that life has unveiled to me. These themes encourage a relearning of my trans identity and an exploration into understanding how a lack of education regarding my indigeneity has impacted this journey of self discovery. The desire to discard the afflictions of a colonist culture that have historically supported the erasure of my indigeneity and in turn my queerness, have been -as i’ve come to realize- the reason why i’ve wrestled with supporting and nurturing different versions of myself for so many years. Now, at 29-years-old I have gained the clarity necessary to see that all versions of me deserve honor and pride no matter how long they take to fully uncover, as this explorative journey has thus far provided for me strength by way of community leadership, creative outlets, queer mentors, and an intimate faith in fate that has led me to understand that being “too much” will never halt my efforts to become the fruition of my ancestors’ wildest dreams. My name is Tyra Sugar Baby Vasquez, I am of Tiwa-Apache descent, and identify as Two-Spirit/Trans Masc.